The Swarm

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Legendarily chintzy "event" producer Irwin Allen (The Towering Inferno) went out with a gargantuan buzz-on with this jaw-droppingly goofy disaster flick. No cliché is left unturned, as a hyperactive strain of hallucination-inducing killer bees get it into their microscopic brains to derail a commuter train, destroy a nuclear power plant, and otherwise decimate a veritable cornucopia of washed-up Match Game panelists (Fred MacMurray, Henry Fonda, Richard Widmark, Patty Duke, Slim Pickens, and narcoleptic dreamboat Richard Chamberlain are just a few of the legendary has-beens to get fatally stung by what appears to be airborne coffee grounds). Be sure to stay tuned through the closing credits for a (lawsuit-preventing?) coda absolving the good ol' hardworking American honeybee of any and all sinister charges depicted herein. An irresistibly hilarious chunk of honey-roasted cheese--'70s style. --Andrew Wright

Description

Irwin Allen's doomsday epic pits an all-star cast against a North American invasion of killer bees!

Customer Reviews:

"Houston on fire,will history blame me or the bees" richard widmark to anyone still listening.......2006-12-05

that is just one of a stream of howling bad lines in this thanksgiving film(a real turkey get it). the novel it was based on was very good but in the hands of irwin allen it becomes of of the funniest comedies of all time. that wasn't what they ment to do,but the script is so silly that the stars, who try hard just can't keep this one from sinking under the bad lines and not so special effects. the cast is just picking up a paycheck on this one. you are now asking ,how i could give this four stars ,well it is very funny and just when you think it can't get any worse,bam,it goes even deeper down the tubes. but if you are the right frame of mind this is one funny movie.

A Genuine Disaster Movie.......2006-11-08

From the producer who gave you "The Towering Inferno" comes this hilarious killer-bee invasion with a "Hollywood Squares" cast (including Fred MacMurray in his final screen role). "The Swarm" is another Irwin Allen schlockfest mired in ludicrous dialogue and unspecial effects. This cinematic turkey inexplicably cost a whopping $21 million, which makes you wonder about creative bookkeeping. A definite must for bad-film aficionados.

Cinematic torture, Irwin Allen style.......2006-10-28

I remember when I was a mere young one that I really wanted to see this film. It didn't play very long in the theater, and I never rented it on VHS. I knew it was going to be bad, but I decided to try it, figuring what the hell else is there to do in 2 1/2 hours? It was one of the worst decisions of my life. This is godawful. There's no way you can recommend this to anyone. Even Gen Xers, who seemed attracted to watching really bad movies and TV shows, would have a hard time enjoying this, in their terms, "ironically". This is the extra long, "roadshow director's cut" that runs an interminable 156 minutes. The film ran 114 minutes in the theaters, but they put this longer version on laserdisc. Warner put the 156 version on the DVD, and we're stuck with it. The performances are so badly over the top (especially Michael Caine and Slim Pickens) that you grimace and wished that you never rented this film. Sure, there are many unintentional laughs, but it's not worth renting the film for. There's even a silly romance between Fred MacMurray, Ben Johnson, and Olivia de Haviland that gets thrown in just to bore you even more. The many guest stars should be ashamed of themselves, but these disaster epics were very hip in the 1970's. It was one of those things where the celebrities of the day HAD to be in it (even then, celebrities had to be at the "hip" thing, no matter how awful it was). The featurette is actually interesting. It's kind of fun to listen to the actors talk about the horrible bees and how they were going to destroy the country (just like the Russian were going to invade and California was going to have a massive earthquake and fall into the ocean, two 1970's whoppers that never happened either). It's great to watch Irwin Allen acting like Mr. Auteur, capturing his "vision". Allen can make a decent film, like The Towering Inferno. But this is just inexcusable. There are boundless continuity flubs here. My favorite has to be the next to last scene. Richard Widmark, Michael Caine, and Katherine Ross are stuck in a high rise being attacked by bees. The army is armed only with flame throwers, but that don't stop the bees. The bees get Widmark (it's a spoiler, but I really hope you don't watch this, much less buy it), but somehow, Caine and Ross escape the building (we never find out how), and make it to an ocean shoreline where they destroy the bees. Did they pinch a cab in the middle of the bee storm? Or were the bees sleeping? Anyway, in conclusion, don't buy this. Please, don't buy this.

"Will history blame me or the bees?".......2006-10-03

There's delusion on an epic scale on display in Irwin Allen's infamous The Swarm. It's not the worst of his oeuvre by a long way - Beyond the Poseidon Adventure and When Time Ran Out are both much, much worse - but it's become the poster child for all the absurdities of the disaster genre at it's hokeyest. But then capsized ships with atom bombs aboard or volcanoes threatening hotel complexes can't compare to killer bees destroying nuclear power plants and causing train wrecks on the Richter Scale of movie absurdity. And it's a curiously second- and third-hand construction too - structurally Stirling Silliphant's script is surprisingly similar to his script for In the Heat of the Night. Okay, there weren't any bees in that one, but from the beginning where big city cop Sidney Poitier is discovered at a murder scene and immediately treated as a suspect by hard-case racist cop Rod Steiger until he gradually learns to respect his expertise, it's being used as a template, with sunflower seed munching entomologist Michael Caine discovered in a missile silo full of dead bodies by hard-case xenophobic general Richard Widmark, who immediately suspects him of their deaths until he gradually learns to respect his expertise (how can you not love a film where Bradford Dillman asks "Can we count on a scientist who prays?" only for Widmark to respond "I wouldn't count on one that didn't"?).

But this isn't a film about trust or even narrative, it's about miscast and affordable stars getting stung to death in slow-motion by what look like bits of oatmeal painted black and fired at them by air-cannons. It's a film about hallucinating patients being menaced by imaginary giant bees. It's a film about military complexes with lots of flashing lights. It's a film about bad acting in the face of insurmountably inane dialogue ("Are you endowing these bees with human motives? Like saving their fellow bees from captivity, or seeking revenge on Mankind?" "I always credit my enemy, no matter what he may be, with equal intelligence." and "Billions of dollars have been spent to make these nuclear plants safe. Fail-safe! The odds against anything going wrong are astronomical, Doctor!" "I appreciate that, Doctor. But let me ask you. In all your fail-safe techniques, is there a provision for an attack by killer bees?" are just the tip of the iceberg). It's about bad fashion sense - this being the 70s, the decade that taste forgot, amid a preponderance of trouser flairs there are a lot of earth tones and oranges amid the costumes, so it's entirely possible that the bees simply mistook the actors for flowers waiting to be pollinated. And it's all done with a gloriously straight face and even, on a few rare occasions, some technical competence - Irwin Allen may have loved schmaltz, but he had a great visual sense when dealing with military hardware and there are some genuinely impressive shots in the picture when he gets to play with the toys. Unfortunately his handling of the actors is much more mechanical, with the old guard (Widmark, Olivia DeHavilland, Henry Fonda, Ben Johnson) faring better than poor old Caine and Katherine Ross. And, like many bad films, it's topped off by a superb score, one of Jerry Goldsmith's very best from his golden period. Much more fun than it's good to admit, the proposed remake has a lot to live up to.

Warners' DVD is pretty good - the extended two-and-a-half hour cut in 2.35:1 widescreen from the old laserdisc release with a 1978 22-minute TV featurette on the making of the film plus the original trailer - but the sound, while acceptable, lacks much range.

"Oh my God! Bees! Millions of bees!".......2005-10-12

This review is for the 156 minute version.

I rented this thinking it was the one with the bees in the Superdome, but no that was THE SAVAGE BEES. Instead I got 2 1/2 hours of Michael Caine looking like he wanted to kill himself for taking this movie. It really is that bad. My eyes were sore from rolling them so much.

How exactly do you assemble such an impressive cast and still make an epically bad film? Answer: you give them a script that is so horrible it would make Ed Wood's head spin. Don't believe me? This movie features not one but two separate scenes were it instantly switches from day to night. How about hanging plants on the outside of a skyscraper? Or a guy in a wheelchair kicking open a door?

The pain begins with the Army finding civilian Michael Caine inside a locked underground military facility. He's alive and everybody else is dead of invisible bee stings. Why he's alive and how he got there is never explained. The President decides that since Caine just happens to be a bee expert to put him in charge of the Army's campaign to destroy the killer bees. Around 40,000 deaths later (I'm not joking) the Army takes control and they attack the billions of bees - that have now taken over Houston - with flamethrowers! Somebody got paid to write this?!

Fred MacMurray and Richard Chamberlain were the only ones that walked away from this wreck unscathed. Everybody else, even the great Henry Fonda should be embarrassed.

This Ugly Yet Beautiful World, Vol. 3: Red Swarm

Average customer rating:

a v.good dvd
A broad spectrum anime

This Ugly Yet Beautiful World, Vol. 3: Red Swarm
Starring: This Ugly Yet Beautiful World
Manufacturer: Adv Films
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Anime & Manga | Genres | DVD | Video

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ASIN: B000I5Y8KK
Release Date: 2006-11-07

Description

Takeru is your typical teenaged average Joe-until he meets Hikari, a beautiful girl who fell from the stars. Immediately Takeru's life turns upside down, as strange creatures and dark forces converge on the unlikely pair. But even while adversity brings them closer, Hikari's mysterious past threatens an even greater danger to Takeru and everything he's known. It's a cosmic love affair with Earth hanging in the balance!

Customer Reviews:

a v.good dvd.......2007-04-02

this one i one of the best anime i ave ever seen

A broad spectrum anime.......2007-01-15

The title was what got my attention, with an artistic air to it that seemed like it would have a meaningful plot. I then read the reviews and learned that it was full of fanservice, something that tends to ruin a lot of Anime.

All in all, the fanservice was obnoxious at points, but the plot was maintained in the background at an appreciable level. It wasn't so deep as to boggle any minds, but it was an enjoyable story with enough depth to keep me interested, but was layered so that if that's not your interest, you still may find something to like about this one.

For a finale, I was pleased with how they completed the character development and explored the main character's hearts and motivations in a very captivating manner.

Average customer rating:

Van-Pires Transform: Swarm Storm
Starring: Van Pires Transform
Manufacturer: Peter Pan
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

Animation | Kids & Family | Genres | DVD | Video

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ASIN: B000R7I3U0
Release Date: 2007-08-28

The 4-4 Swarm Defense-Understanding the Basics

Average customer rating:

The 4-4 Swarm Defense-Understanding the Basics

Manufacturer: Coaches Choice
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

Average customer rating:

Remarkably Bad - Yet Mildly Entertaining
BEE NIGN THRILLER

Hell Swarm
Starring: Jesse Borrego , Luci Christian , Brady Coleman , Susana Gibb , and Joey Gibson
Manufacturer: Paramount
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

General | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video

Alien Invasion | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video

Aliens | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video

( H ) | Titles | Features | DVD | Video
ASIN: B00008NV4K
Release Date: 2003-06-24

Description

Accused of murdering his partner, policeman Bill Sabbath (Boyd Kestner, "Black Hawk Down") has just been executed by the authorities. But Billy's execution was a ruse, staged by a top government agent (Tim Matheson, TV's "The West Wing") who needs Billy for a secret commando unit to fight the aliens. Known as the Phylum, the aliens appear to be human, but are endowed with superhuman strength and a deadly plan - the first day of spring, they will release millions of bees infected with hyper-toxic venom, and unless Billy can destroy their operation first, mankind will discover hell on earth...

Customer Reviews:

Remarkably Bad - Yet Mildly Entertaining.......2005-02-15

Hell Swarm is one of those films you pick up thinking you may have stumbled onto a little sleeper of a film that no one but you knows about. After watching it you'll want to keep that secret to yourself - for all the wrong reasons.

In truth there are elements of Hell Swarm that, in the right hands - and with a bit more of a budget - could be developed into a decent, gripping little thriller. Unfortunately those hands unfortunately are not Tim Matheson's, who directs (and acts in) the film.

Boyd Kestner is appealing as the "hero" if a bit bumbling but the rest of the cast seem to have spilled over from WB shows that never aired.

Even though there is some swearing, "decent" violence and sensuality, the entire affair feels like it was made for, well the WB Network or USA Up All Night.

BEE NIGN THRILLER.......2004-03-20

HELL SWARM is a little misleading to say the least. The promo for the film seems to focus on a batch of killer bees, laced with a deadly skin eating virus, that is meant to destroy mankind and let a race of aliens take over the earth. There is one bee attack, but it isn't shown; the plot mainly focuses on trying to stop these aliens from taking over other humans and procreating (a la INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS). Kathryn Morris (now seen on "Cold Case") does a decent job as the female law enforcer, but Tim Matheson as the steely manager and Boyd Kestner as the stalwart hero, don't have the oomph to catapult this classic wannabe.
Trite but mildly entertaining.

Average customer rating:

Defensive Line Play In the 4-4 Swarm

Manufacturer: Coaches Choice
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

Average customer rating:

The 4-4 Swarm Defense--Understanding the Basics

Manufacturer: Coaches Choice
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

Product Description

The 4-4 Swarm DefenseUnderstanding the Basics presents a comprehensive overview of the basic concepts, principles, and fundamentals involved in successfully executing the 4-4 swarm defense. The DVD breaks down the core philosophy underlying the defense and details the key factors that make this scheme so devastating to an opponents offense. The DVD also explains how the defense enables teams to attack their opponents at such a furious pace, to defend a variety of offenses, and to be able to respond appropriately to anything an offense might try to do. Among the topics covered: goals, philosophy, developmental drills, and formation adjustments.

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Linebackers Play In the 4-4 Swarm

Manufacturer: Coaches Choice
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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Defensive Back Play in the 4-4 Swarm

Manufacturer: Coaches Choice
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

Product Description

Defensive Back Play in the 4-4 Swarm reviews the critical role that defensive backs play in a devastating defense and details how they can best defend against both the run and the pass in the 4-4 swarm defensive scheme. The DVD also explains how defensive backs can avoid giving up a quick score. In addition, the DVD covers how defensive backs defend the most common run and pass plays that they might see during the season. The DVD also features a discussion of a unique way of using the free safety against the run at the point of attack. Among the topics covered: alignment, defending 4-vertical, defending the run, defending the pass, defending spread sets and trick plays, and film cut-ups.

Average customer rating:

Defensive Back Play In the 4-4 Swarm

Manufacturer: Coaches Choice
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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DVD

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