The Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection - The Essentials (Manos, the Hands of Fate / Santa Claus Conquers the Martians)

Description

Join Joel and his "robot friends" as they're forced to endure two of the worst movies ever made. To maintain their sanity, they hilariously skewer the films' performaces, special effects and dialogue.

Customer Reviews:

MST3K The Essentials indeed!!.......2007-07-20

Watching Manos is down right torture. Joel and the Bots make this a more enjoyable torture. I read in the MST3K guide that the whole process of making this episode was difficult because the movie is so bad. After viewing it, I fully understand. What a horrible, god awful piece of garbage this is. The perfect movie for the crew in the Satellite of love and having Mike Nelson show up as Torgo in a skit , makes this one a must see. As for Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, well, lets just say that Manos blows this one away. If there were any two movies to call essential for MST3K, they hit the nail on the head. I will keep my fingers crossed for Essentials 2!!!

TWO GREAT EPISODES , BUY WHY RE - RELEASE MANOS?.......2007-06-03

This is a great set,but I would have rather had another episode other than "Manos" that hasn't been released yet! If you are familar with the show, you know this set includes two great episodes "Manos Hands of Fate" and "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians". If you are not familar with it, it isn't a bad place to start. This is a very funny show for those who "get it". I just hope they can continue to obtain the rights to the movies and keep releasing these gems. The essentials DVD collection (2 disc set) contains all that was included on the first Rhino single disc release of "Manos". The "Santa Claus Conquers The Martians" episode is a classic and this is the first time it has been released on DVD.

DVD.......2007-04-11

The show is still funny BUT - I prefer the orignial cast and crew and would not pay over $10.00 ( shipping included ) for this DVD.

Good choice.......2007-03-14

Anything from the folks at Best Brains is a winner, as far as I am concerned, but I was hoping for more special features. Nonetheless, if you want to pick 2 essential episodes those would be it. Manos is one of my top 5 fave episodes, and it had been years since I'd seen Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. So, if you are a die-hard MST3K fan like me you'll still love it no matter what.

"Ziggy had Garfield nuetered? Now that's funny!".......2007-02-28

If anything this is one of my favorite MST3K collections, as it contains two of the funniest episodes ever produced:

"Manos: The Hands of Fate"? YES! This episode is definitely the best of the two, as one of top 100 worst films of all time has been skewered in every way shape, and form, even the opening sequence itself. This episode contains really funny riffings that run at a fast rate. And as you can tell from the title of this review, this contains my favorite host segment: the Cartuner, a device that mixes two unfunny comic strips in one and makes the comic funny. This a sheer way to end MST's fourth season with a bang. 10/10

"Santa Claus Conquers The Martians" is another favorite of mine, as Joel and the bots really rip on another Saturday-morning children's film involving Martians trying to find jolly ol' St. Nick himself to bring Christmas to Mars. As stupid as this film is, the commentary with Joel and the 'bots is uproariously funny, host segments and all. Let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas for this one, why don't we? 9.5/10

In addition, you'll also get a funny half-hour outtake reel. 8/10

Average customer rating:

Possibly the "Worst" Film Ever Made -- But How Can I Hate This One?
Wacky, smart and funny Christmas fun
Santa Claus failed to conquer - no DVD was in the case!
The title is a giveaway
Brilliantly Dumb Christmas Movie

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Starring: John Call , Leonard Hicks , Vincent Beck , Bill McCutcheon , and Victor Stiles
Director: Nicholas Webster
Manufacturer: Delta
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B00008G7EG
Release Date: 2002-09-17

Description

The children of Mars are depressed and no one seems to know why. When Martian leaders go to see their most ancient wise man, he tells them that the children of Mars need the joy of Christmas... and Santa Claus!

Customer Reviews:

Possibly the "Worst" Film Ever Made -- But How Can I Hate This One?.......2007-08-21

If you say "Santa Clause Conquers Martians" is the worst film ever made, I won't disagree. I think I have recently seen much worse (and more costly) films coming from Hollywood (how about "Son of the Mask"?), but I am sure that even kids would find "SCCM" stunningly terrible with its wooden acting, impossible plot and incredible dialogues (a girl says to a Martian with antennae in his head: "Are you a television set?") and the cheaply set obviously made from cardboard.

For some die-hard filmgoers, certain "bad" films become good because of their badness, but I seriously doubt "Santa" would be one of them. I enjoyed watching it - its robot, miniature spaceship and fearful "Polar bear" - they all look cheap, and kind of fun to be sure, but the film's pace is very slack. The "joy" of watching silly things like a bargain-basement robot moving awkwardly (and suddenly forgotten in the middle of the plot) soon evaporates because of the poor, really poor direction.

[PIA ZADRA] But I couldn't hate the film for ... how can I? Pia Zadra (her debut, with her face painted green) appears as "Girmar" ("Girl" + "Martian"), who keeps watching television (or intergalactic TV from Earth). Concerned daddy Kimar insists that kids on the Mars needs Santa Claus, travels to the Earth and kidnaps him from his workshop. It's family and love!

Oh, and the story. "Santa Clause Conquers Martians" - this silly title tells you all, you may think. Well, it surely conveys to us the film's utter silliness, but not exactly the content. Actually, in this film Santa (or Santy Claus as the film calls him) does not "conquer" the Mars and its green-faced residents. As I said, he is only abducted by them (together with two earthling kids Billy and Betty); Santa in fact "conquers" the Martians with toys, humor and his routine Ho-ho-ho! Here is a film waiting to be remade by Tim Burton.

But seriously, the most charming part is that Martians here are mostly kind and gentle, not ferocious, brutal and ruthless killers of H. G. Wells. The leader Kimar strictly forbids destroying anything and anybody and sticks to his principle to the end. Considering the time it was made (it was 1964), maybe we shouldn't make fun of its apparently silly story about the benevolent aliens "conquered" by Santa Claus and his toys.

Well, anyway, sit back and enjoy yourself. This is a "family picture" Ed Wood might have done.

Wacky, smart and funny Christmas fun.......2007-05-11

I know it's become hip to pan this film has one of the worst ever, but that is not the case. This humorous, good-natured film is a bizarre mix of Holiday movie with the sci-fi genre.... and it works. Sure the budget is low, the effects chintzy, but it captures and innocence and magic kids today need badly. Much like the Martian kids do in the movie.

Love this film, hope someday someone gives it a good remastering.

Santa Claus failed to conquer - no DVD was in the case!.......2007-02-27

We got the DVD wrapped as new, yet there was no DVD in the case. Luckily, Amazon did a great job sending us a replacement immediately, but it was upsetting that the PASSPORT VIDEO has such poor quality control....

The title is a giveaway.......2007-01-20

If you go by the title alone, you've got to say to yourself "This has got to be high camp". I can't imagine that anyone associated with this project thought for one minute that they were creating a classic. The sets, the costumes, the acting... all really cheesy. I did have fun watching the whole mess, though. My 10 year son and I watched it last year and laughed out loud all the way through. I guess I would only recommend this film to people who understand camp and would certainly not suggest that people who want a more traditional approach to Santa waste their time. For that, you might watch "Polar Express".

Brilliantly Dumb Christmas Movie.......2006-12-24

Yes Virginia there is such thing as brilliantly dumb. This movie has all the marks of B Movie. Awful acting, flimsy plot, stupid dialogue, crappy effects and cardboard costumes. Heh Heh just the way I like it. Look this movie isn't some cruddy senitmental box office busting Christmas movie it turns the formulaic Christmas movie story on its head. Instead Martians with green face paint and fake metal helmets kidnap two earth kids and Santa Clause and take them to Mars so that they can make space toys for Martian kids. That alone should make you buy the thing. Junk yes, Art yes!

Average customer rating:

Possibly the "Worst" Film Ever Made -- But How Can I Hate This One?
Wacky, smart and funny Christmas fun
Santa Claus failed to conquer - no DVD was in the case!
The title is a giveaway
Brilliantly Dumb Christmas Movie

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Starring: John Call , Leonard Hicks , Vincent Beck , Bill McCutcheon , and Victor Stiles
Director: Nicholas Webster
Manufacturer: Alpha Video
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B0002W4U9I
Release Date: 2004-10-26

Customer Reviews:

Possibly the "Worst" Film Ever Made -- But How Can I Hate This One?.......2007-08-21

Wacky, smart and funny Christmas fun.......2007-05-11

Santa Claus failed to conquer - no DVD was in the case!.......2007-02-27

The title is a giveaway.......2007-01-20

Brilliantly Dumb Christmas Movie.......2006-12-24

Average customer rating:

Cheese please
Why Are You Reading This?
Hang up that mistletoe
The best version on DVD.

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Starring: Vincent Beck , James Cahill , John Call , Donna Conforti , and Josip Elic
Director: Nicholas Webster
Manufacturer: Woodhaven Ent
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B0002JP32Y
Release Date: 2004-08-31

Customer Reviews:

Cheese please.......2006-07-11

As a child, I was chilled by the television commercials for this movie - the dark, snowy scenes of the robot lurking around the arctic, stalking the children; and aliens! In the theater, I remember having a great time with all the other kids in the audience: this movie had it all, as far as we were concerned - Santa Claus, Martians, a robot, toys, comic relief, spaceships - perfect for the children of the mid-1960s. It wasn't until many years later that I came to appreciate what I call "The Cheese Factor", i.e.: a movie made with minimal budget but with heart, something that kids will love and adults will roll their eyes. Today's children probably wouldn't give this move the time of day, which is a shame because they need an alternative to violent Anime-inspired cartoons and video games, and appreciate an effort that - while it has the look and feel of a glorified school play - is aimed for children of all ages who just want to have some fun and enjoy some silliness without worrying about whether "it's the bomb". This DVD preserves the "public domain" look; you feel like you are watching a FILM, complete with grain and scratches, as it should. Turn off the lights and transport yourself back to the big movie theater full of other kids, singing along to the title music (the lyrics, after all, are provided right there on the screen). The additions of the seasonal cartoon and Sherlock Holmes piece make it feel like the old "double feature and a cartoon" from days gone by. This DVD is a welcome respite from all the glossy high-tech films being cranked out today. No matter what your physical age, as long as there is an eight-year old lurking inside you who still puts out cookies and milk for Santa on December 24th, you will enjoy this DVD.

Why Are You Reading This?.......2006-01-26

There are some movies that you wonder why they were ever made. This movie is one of those. The Martians' children are glued to their television sets watching mind-numbing earth television (who knew!). The children won't eat, won't sleep. The solution? Go kidnap Santa Claus to make the children happy.

One of the Martians, a friendly sort named Voldar (Vincent Beck), thinks they should be tougher on the children and he also has a propensity for wanting to kill just about everything in sight.

The heroes of the story are Billy (Victor Stiles) and Betty (Donna Conforti), who manage to keep one step ahead of Voldar, and are ultimately instrumental in saving Santa Claus.

The special effects are cheap and cheesy. The acting is generally awful. The dialogue sounds like something from a bad 50s television show. All this is the background for Pia Zadora's movie debut. As bad as this movie is, I think I have now watched it twice, and I will probably watch it again some time in the future (maybe), if for no other reason than to remind myself how bad it is. One proviso; as bad as this movie may be, somehow young children seem to enjoy it. I think only because Santa Claus is in it, and he overcomes the bad guys. Everyone else should consider what they are getting into before they buy this one.

Hang up that mistletoe .......2005-11-25

Soon you'll hear Ho! Ho! Ho!

It is the Christmas season on earth. The Martian children are in a funk and will not eat their chocolate cake pills. Kimar (Leonard Hicks) a concerned father and a leader of the council calls up on the old man of the cave. His diagnosis is that Mars Needs a Santa; so in the interest of the children of Mars Kimar sets out to pilfer Santa (John Call.) Opposed to this attempted attitude change on a planetary scale is the curmudgeon Voldar (Vincent Beck). You can not miss Voldar because he looks like a green Groucho Marks. To add to the pathos a couple of pint size hostages are also taken, Billy (Victor Stiles) and Betty (Donna Conforti).

Is this the end of Christmas as we know it?
What is Voldar's evil plan?
Are Billy & Betty doomed to drift around in space, or be captives of Mars forever?

Or is it just possible that Santa Claus Conquers the Martians?

The best version on DVD........2004-11-09

This DVD from Intermedia (Woodhaven), is the best version on DVD. The print quality used is much better that that used on other DVD's.

[DVD] Santa Claus Conquers The Martians (1964) by Movie Classics

Average customer rating:

[DVD] Santa Claus Conquers The Martians (1964) by Movie Classics

Manufacturer: Movie Classics
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B0006N9B9C

Product Description

Santa Claus Conquers The Martians (196, 80 minutes) When the Martians tune into a television broadcast from Earth and feel that their children are being wrongfully influenced by the human image of Santa Claus thats being transmitted, they decide to commit and earth-shaking kidnapping... Digitally Remastered, Sound Enhanced.

Average customer rating:

Horrible Quality DVD
S-a-n-t-a C-l-a-u-s, Hooray for "Santy" Claus

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Starring: Vincent Beck , James Cahill , John Call , Donna Conforti , and Josip Elic
Director: Nicholas Webster
Manufacturer: PASSPORT VIDEO
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B000A2HA9M
Release Date: 2005-10-04

Description

This feature-length 1964 camp "classic" stars a ten-year-old Pia Zadora as a green-faced Martian girl who helps rescue Santa when he's kidnapped by evil Martians. This is one of those films that's so bad, it's good. See if you can figure out how green-faced Martians wound up with New York accents - having grown up hundreds of thousands of miles from Brooklyn!

Customer Reviews:

Horrible Quality DVD.......2005-11-27

This version of the film is released by PASSPORT VIDEO which is bad news. Passport likes to put their logo in the corner of the screen and finds just about the worst quality they can possibly dig up. This DVD has jumps in the film and couldn't get too much more grainy looking.

This is the second time I've been burned by Passport video. The first time being their DVD of Plan 9 From Outer Space which suffers the same fate. If I had noticed this one was released by Passport I wouldn't have bought it but I didn't even check. Shame on me and shame on Passport for releasing such garbage. Stay away from their releases at all costs.

As for the film itself, see the review below.

S-a-n-t-a C-l-a-u-s, Hooray for "Santy" Claus.......2005-09-26

It's the kookiest Christmas ever when Santa Claus is kidnapped by Martians in this "you have to see it to believe it" Christmas "classic." Maybe you've seen this movie hilariously skewered on Mystery Science Theater 3000, but you have to watch it on its own to truly appreciate it. Santa Claus Conquers the Martians is just so bad that I can't help but love it, and that explains why I am giving this deservedly one-star movie four stars. The Martian get-ups are more ridiculous than Marvin the Martian's normal attire, the sets redefine the very definition of cheap, the acting is over-the-top and generally horrible, and Santa is - well, he's just a little bit weird, if you ask me. Every time the guy starts in with his distinctive laughing (usually for no apparent reason), I am reminded of the fact that Satan is spelled with the same letters as Santa.

Things aren't going so well on Mars. It's bad enough that the Martians are all colored a ridiculous shade of green, dress like rejected superheroes, and wear ridiculous antenna-spouting helmets on their heads at all times, but now the children of Mars are all acting depressed and withdrawn; all they want to do is sit and watch Earth TV. Kimar (Leonard Hicks), the leader of Mars, seeks the advice of the planet's 800-year old wise man and is told that he must bring Santa Claus to Mars so that the children can actually have fun and be children for a little while. Voldar (Vincent Beck) opposes the plan every step of the way, arguing that Kimar's plan will soon result in a whole planet full of lily-livered, mush-brained nincompoops. Kimar wins out and sets off for Earth in the most pathetic spaceship of all time to catch Santa and bring him back to Mars - along with two Earthling children. Well, Santa starts up a new workshop on Mars, hoping he'll be allowed to return home in time for Christmas, but Voldar is as tenacious as he is ridiculous-looking and is determined to kill Santa and stomp out all signs of Christmas spirit on the red planet.

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians features a young Pia Zadora as a little Martian girl, but perhaps the movie's most unforgettable feature is the swinging theme song, Hooray for Santa Claus. If you watch the movie, you'll have this silly song in your head for days. Dropo (Bill McCutcheon) gives a memorable performance as Mars' resident screw-up with a heart of gold, but my thoughts always remain with John Call and his disturbingly weird portrayal of Santa Claus. I can pretty much guarantee that this movie will make you laugh with its unashamed ineptness, and bad movie lovers are ineligible for their very first merit badge until they have watched Santa Claus Conquers the Martians and lived to tell about it.

Average customer rating:

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Starring: Vincent Beck , James Cahill , John Call , Donna Conforti , and Josip Elic
Director: Nicholas Webster
Manufacturer: Westlake Ent. Group
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B0006HU2Y6
Release Date: 2004-11-01

Description

Martian children have become unhappy watching Earth television programs showing Christmas cheer among humans. The wise old Martian Chochem tells the adults that Mars needs Santa Claus to bring fun and jow to their children. A group of Martians arrives at the North Pole and kidnaps Santa, but the angry Martian Voldar wants to get rid of him instead. With the help of two Earth children and the clumsy Martian Dropo, Santa defeats Voldar and brings happiness to Mars!

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Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

Manufacturer: Synergy Ent
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B000R34XWG
Release Date: 2007-05-29

Drive In Classics: Volume 1 "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" Double Feature

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Drive In Classics: Volume 1 "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" Double Feature

ProductGroup: DVD
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ASIN: B000L42NU0
Release Date: 2006-11-27

Description

This collection of science fiction classics includes; "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" (1964) and "Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women" (1968).

Children's Christmas Matinee: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

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Children's Christmas Matinee: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

Manufacturer: PC Treasures, Inc
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

1 Full length movie and more.

ASIN: B000LMRDRU

Product Description

Children"s Christmas Matinee "SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE mARTIANS" also includes "The Red Skelton Show- Freddie and The Yultide Doll" Plus two Cartoons.

DVD:

DVD

DVD