Alien 3000

Description

Three college students leave their school worries behind for a camping weekend of fun. Their fun turns serious when the trio encounters a strange being in a remote cave. Days later, Forest Rangers discover the bodies of the three slain students in the forest. The crime scene is all too familiar to an unexplained creature attack from years ago that only left one survivor. The military sends out a rouge military unit to hunt the creature with the help of the only survivor of the previous attack, Kate (Megan Malloy) who has been confined to a mental institution since the horrific attack.

Customer Reviews:

This movie is fantastic...you want to know why...?.......2007-08-17

Cause it's absolutely freaking hilarious. Me and my friends have a favorite past time, and that is to find the worst movies ever made and make fun of them (a-la mystery science theater 300). Many times we thought we had found the one true king of cinema crap (Carnosaur 4, The Thing Below, House of the Dead, Anonymous Rex, the list goes on)...until we found this movie. It is the proverbial gold mine, the cave of wonders for those looking to laugh at everything a movie should never be. From the script, to the camera work (you can't even call it cinematography) to the acting, to the plot, to the...special effects???...try and watch this movie and not laugh aloud at every scene, the ending is preciously hysterical. I swear to you, this movie is totally worth 5 bucks simply for it's sheet comic value.

worse than "Plan 9 from outer space"........2007-06-24

Lorenzo Lamas must have took part in this movie after losing a bet! The best part is the peeping Tom scene at the begining, trust me, shut off the movie about 5 minutes into it. It has; No brain College students, a gratuitous make out scene (cut short), a monster which never seems to look the same from one scene to another, merc's who act like they are doing this 'cuz they just lost their jobs as "Walmart greeters", a helicoptor that in long shots is an R.C. model and the inside has crap stuck on the walls to make it LOOK like its a helicoptor (like a "High Voltage" sign somebody swiped from a warehouse). But getting back to the Merc's, you look forward to their deaths, because your 1 body closer to the end! "OH MY GOD! DUMMY DELUXE IS DEAD!!!... Well, lets all go back to our flimsy tents and not put out any guards, and get a nice rest so we can go 100 yards to the monsters lair tomorrow and lose somebody else". Oh, and just to mess it up for you,... The monster NEVER does come through the wall of any tent. I guess I could have made this a whole lot simpler if I just wrote "ALIEN 3000" then spit on the screen. (an homage to Peter Griffin) OH YEAH! Did I mention, the picture on the cover? THAT ain't the moster, nor has it got to do with the "Alien" series. It SUCKED!

What the.........2007-06-03

WTF is this?

The monster is just a crossed eye powerranger reject.

And the interview with the "monster" was so lame.. whoever was involed into making this movie should be publically guillotined.

just shoot me now and put me out of my misery.......2007-06-02

I can't believe I actually spent my hard earned money on this DVD (even though it was on sale for four bucks). I figured seeing Lorenzo Lamas and Priscilla Barnes' names, it might be entertaining. Wrong! Based on the lousy acting, special effects (if you can even call it that) and story (or lack, thereof), the people who made this DVD must have made their money back from all the suckers (me included) who wasted their time and money on buying it.

The plot was so ridiculous! An invisible alien is hiding in a cave in the mountains guarding (or eating?!?) a cache of gold treasure and swords!!! Of course, when the alien starts killing people, a secret government agency starts to investigate. For whatever reason, a team of the most un-mercenary-like mercenaries (including a punk rock/goth girl!) are called into to assist. Apparently just wearing mismatched camo pattern clothes makes you a mercenary.

There's a gratuitous sex scene between the punk rock/goth merc girl and some middle aged mercenary. As a typical, red-blooded American guy, I like gratuitous sex scenes. But this one was so pathetically bad, I actually felt embarrassed for those actors.

What made this movie even worse was the fact that the B-list actors (Lamas and Barnes) didn't even interact with the other unknown actors, except in one short scene. It was like filming two separate movies and then piecing them together to get this mess. Ugh!

I'm sure there are a lot of worse movies than this one but Alien 3000 definitely should get "honorable" mention with them.

SO BAD, A "0" RATING IS TOO MUCH!.......2007-05-14

I bought this DVD sight unseen because I love Horror/Sci-Fi and it read good on the box.

It took me three different attempts to view this tripe. Every time I sat down to watch it, I turned it off and did something else! The dialogue was horrendous. It is the usual crappy, horney, gut-ripping, rubber monster stuff which is just an insult to anyone who is looking for a good scare. And what's with the team leader keeping that disgusting hateful psychotic woman on the team? Who would trust such a person? Just goes to show you what a crappy script this is.

I can't convey to you how bad this thing is except to say, LOOK AT ALL THE 1-STAR RATINGS IT GOT!

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